No Day Like Today

rubs eyes

Wed, 07 Oct 2009 21:09:06 GMT

It seems I am not the only one with grief again Chem teacher. Their words are worse, but the sentiment is the same. A strange sense of relief. I don't like to think that I am petty and hateful. *shakes head* After Christmas break, I never have to see her again.

Lab Exam yesterday. Did okay dokay. Had Princess Di. Really nice woman. She completed my OPA competency form while I was at it.

The lab was a cakewalk for me. After all that EMR training? Ha! Find myself reciting the full docket at warp speed before slowing down and hitting the high notes. Course then people think I know more than I do. I can just assess situations and patients really well, but I've only every inserted OPAs and have only watched ETTs and LMAs being used.

Patient Assessment exam on Friday.

Fundamentals exam Friday after. Anatomy and Physiology on the same day.

Prof Practices essay on November 2. Presentation the week after.

The hardest will be fundamentals. Memorizing numbers. Ugh. I can tell you positions and contraindications, but the rest? Bah. TIme to start using this as my study review guide again.

Let's start with the first in the line of upcoming exams.

Patient Assessment:

Preinteraction Stage -- review chart and orders

Introductory Stage -- introduce self to patient using social space, sets tone for entire visit. Greet using formal name, followed by description of your purpose and role--even if pt is unresponsive. Cardiac arrest doesn't require this curtesy. Confirm pt identity (armband, paperwork, verbalize) Ask before looking at armband, maintaning respect. Establish report while not being overly jovial and irrititating (a direct quote, that is, and bloody hard to do)

Initial Assessment Stage -- informal and formal assessment, physical examination. Form own opinion regarding treatment, obtaining new orders if needed.

Treatment and Monitoring Stage -- Administer treatment, assessing for changes and side effects. Identify, document, and inform others regarding positive or negative changes.

Follow-up Stage -- Communicate treatment and contact info to pt. Document. Make pt comfortable before leaving room, solidifying rapport.

Can't help but feel that the rapport is used as another tool. i can understand wanting open communication and trust, but sheesh, when did it go into a textbook checklist?

Public Space -- 12-15 feet. Innapropriet for conversation.
Social Space -- 4-12 feet. Introductions and establishing rapport. Formal topics only. Get big picture.

Personal Space -- 18 inches to 4 feet. Interview. Build rapport. Eye contact is crucial.
Intimate Space -- 0-18 inches. Request permission. Examination and therapy. Eye contact=creepy

Territoriality -- Ask permission before moving or using items in pt room--including hospital furniture.

Confidentiality -- FOIP Need to know basis. Refer all family members to physician. (Used that one TONS)

Genuine Concern -- impossible to replicate. Give pt undivided attention. Face and eye contact. Open posture. "Appropriate use of touch"

Active Listening -- ask for clarrification, note taking, etcetera

10 Golden Rules of Clinical Etiquette
1) Maintain professional appearance
2) Identify yourself by name and role (really bad about this)
3) Do not call pt by their first name unless given permission to do so by pt (kids are the exception)
4) Respect and preserve pt modesty
5) Do not rest foot on bedframe (Come on people!) or sit on pt bed without permission
6) Do not talk about pt in public place
7) Do not discuss prognosis or serious issues with others in front of pt
8) Do not argue in front of patient
9) Do not criticize actions of health team in front of pt
10) Keep disagreements and criticism out of pt chart

Universal precautions -- Duh

Question/Statement types:
Closed ended (How long did the pain last?)
Open ended (What happened next?)
Direct (Why?)
Indirect (If I understand you correctly . . .)

Neutral (I see)
Reflecting (echoing)
Facilitating (um, yes, I see)
Communicating empathy and support (Must have been tough)

Complete History (hx)
Demographic data
date and source of hx

p condition at time of hx
Chief complaint
hx of present illness
past hx
Family hx
Social and enviro hx
Review of systems
Signature

*blush* Got distracted by hunky cartoon heros in briefs. Ahem. Carry on.

Cough

Inspiratory phase -- opening of glottis, contraction of muscles (diaphragm, thoracic, and abdominal), increase in lung volume, increase in length of bronchi

Compression phase -- closure of glottis, relaxation of diaphragm, tightening of expiratory muscles against glottis, generating high intrathoracic pressure, narrowing of trachea and bronchi

Expiratory phase -- opening of glottis, explosive release of intrathoracic air, vibration of vocal cords,and mucosal lining of posterior laryngeal wall. Shakes secretions loose, moving material out of respiratory tract.

GAHHH!!! Work just called me in for 4 hours. *sigh* Will finish this post later.

Right, where were we?

Long list of possible causes of cough. Different types of cough. Here's me hoping there will be a coughing class and I won't have to know all of this in great detail for tomorrow--unfortunately I fear this IS the coughing class.

Effective -- strong enough to clear the airway
Inadequate -- audible, but too weak to mobilize secretions
Productive -- substances expelled by the cough
Dry -- secretions not produced
Barking -- seal like
Brassy -- harsh, dry
Hoarse -- chews cud, larynx problem
Inspiratory stridor -- larynx problem
Wheezy -- accompanied by whistling or sighing
Chronic productive -- COPD
Hacking -- frequent brief periods of coughing or throat clearing

Sputum/Phlegm -- only differentiated by overly anal textbooks
Tenacious -- sticky
Frothy
Mucoid -- clear, thin, oversecretion of bronchi
Fetid -- improper suctioning, cesspool, bacteria
Hemoptysis -- bloody sputum
Hematemesis -- blood in vomit
Dyspnea -- shortness of breath
Paroxysmal Nocturnal Dyspnea -- sudden onset when pt is sleeping in recumbent position, fluid in lower extremity --> lungs
Orthopnea -- inability to breath when lying down
Treopnea -- dyspnea from lying on one side
Platypnea -- dyspnea from upright posture
Orthodeoxia -- decreased blood O2 when upright
Apnea -- no breathing
Eupnea -- good breathing
Bradypnea -- slow breathing
Tachypnea -- fast breathing
Hypopnea - decreased depth
Hyperpnea -- increased depth
Air Hunger -- Code Blue in training

2 page list on different types of pain and causes. 0.o Glarg. *skims*

ischemia -- low blood suply to myocardium
Syncope -- fainting, loss of consciousness caused by reduced blood flow

Eutheria -- good temp, 97-99.5F (36-37 C) and a degree higher in afternoon than in morning

Fever
Sustained -- continuously elevating
Remittent -- contiinuously elevated to varying degrees
Intermittent -- normal, high, normal, etc
Relapse -- over several days

Snoring, mental change, etcetera.

Vitals
After surgery -- every 15mins for 2h, then 30 mins for 1-2hs

LOC, body type. Check, check, check.

Pulse:
Newborn 90-170
1 year 80-160
preschool 80-120
10 year 70-110
adult 60-100
athlete about 50

Resp Rate:

Newborn 35-45 up to 70 with exertion
1 year 25-35
preschool 20-25
10 year 15-20
adult 12-20
athlete 12-20

And the rest really can't be listed out. All reading from here on. At least in this class.

So . . . .

Sat, 03 Oct 2009 03:50:30 GMT

Been a while, but I got into the program.

Got the call just before heading on vacation. Went on vacation. Found funding. Started. Worked 8 days while going to school full time. No chance to write much here.

School mon-fri. Work friday evening work sat work sun school mon-friday chores on saturday take nieces to fort sunday school mon-friday work friday evening work saturday work sunday . . .

There. We're caught up.

Heh, you wish.

8 classes. Two online to be completed at your own pace. Finished Infection Control in the first three weeks. Started Medical Terminology right after. Got ahead and then lost my freaking book on Wednesday. Now I have to find a text book someone isn't using. Won't make up for my book though. That thing condensed 30 pages of reading materiel into 4 pages of studyable goodness.

Chemistry is taught by my new least favorite teacher. You need high 80's to 90's in Chem 30 to get into this program and Ms A is still prattling on about valence electrons. I kid you not, she handed us all markers and stickers to play with. I did not go to night school while working full time, getting home past midnight, having no saturday off to sit in a classroom and be patted on the head for knowing what the fucking molecular mass of hydrogen is!

/rant

2nd least favorite teacher is Fundamentals. He smiles the most, jokes the most, and has the least sincere eyes. Passive aggressive to the extreme. Starts class 5 minutes earlier than anyone else and locks the door at the very last minute, telling you to wait outside if you are late. He takes joy in trick questions and in making your lab scenario tests difficult. Unyeilding would be the right word for him and I could accept--even respect-that, but the "i'm your best friend with a knife at your throat" act is really grating on my nerves. The class is half didactic, half lab. Less G in lab, thank gods. But he's there when it counts.

Applied Sciences is as close to quantum physics as I am ever going to get. Quite fond of it, though the teacher has me doubting reality and is making me paranoid about the "facts" I read.

Proffessional Practices is an odd course. We played with toilette paper for the first five days of class. Lots of introductions. Watched Michal Moore's Sicko and right when I thought I had it figured out, Mrs S pulls out the power point and gives us group ethical assignments. Two weeks to write an essay, one month to make a display. My group chose Culture and Religion in Healthcare. First stop, Jehova Witnesses and blood transfusions. Next? Maybe Scientologists. I like the thought of aliens and angels conspiring against doctors. Maybe we'll dress up?

Anatomy and Physiology is a rather dry course, but the teacher is quite amusing. "New research says diarrhea is genetic." *pause* "It runs in your genes." He believes in a glass of wine and a hamburger a day to keep the body healthy and the mind firm.

Patient Assessment is usually the last class of the day. D tries his best, but he's usually tired and we're usually not paying full attention to him after 7 hours of class. So far his class ends with "You know what? Just go home early and read this stuff. The book has everything the powerpoint does."

And they all have exams in October. And November. And December. 2 midterms and a comprehensive final per class.

Open house is this weekend. Working thurs, fri, sunday and pulling voluntary double shifts on saturday.

For open house, I'm assigned as part of the attention grabbing fake code blue that goes around on a stretcher doing CPR all morning. Evening shift will be answering questions I don't know the answers to regarding continuing care. Party afterwards at the class president's place. Not sure if I'll go. Work in the morning. Not a drinker. blah blah blah

Joined dodgeball. We won every game except our last. That last game wasn't really us though. Every team joined up into two MEGA teams. Our side just happen to lose.

Pulled my quad on our second game. Literally could not move. My dodging was more like falling, but my arm was realy good that night. Earned a bit of respect for not quitting. Half the people who signed up didn't show up.

Getting to know people. Two days before the first day of school I was on the recieving end of a rant regarding how backstabbing and horrible staff and students were. It jaded my view a bit and I went from happy excited girl to paranoid quiet girl. Didn't make the best first impression. The people who sit next to me or pair up with me in lab know better by now. The rest . . . not so much.

Work has been frustrating or fabulous with very little in between. I am either treated as an object or as a celebrity and I have no idea on the why or the who. Had my first code. Was in front of the parents too. That sucked because right after they saw me run for the crash cart and pull out the defibrillator, I had to go to them with my best Smile Face and ask them to please wait in the play room, a doctor will be out to speak to you soon. Baby was okay. death during surgery is near on impossible unless you're being harvested or had brain trauma. It's when you go to the wards that you need to worry.

Okay. All done now. No sleep till midnight. Then off to school I go. Unless I get called in. That would suck.

Nervooose

Tue, 28 Apr 2009 20:00:04 GMT

Nerve noose.

o.0

I like it!

Got called for an interview at NAIT for the respiratory therapist program. Friday.

MEEP!

10 questions. 10 questioners. points allotted. Whomever gets the most points gets in. Top 50 in. Rest, g'luck next time.

Top 60% gets inerviews. Not anything special. Except to me.

Why Hello Lady of the Night

Sat, 04 Apr 2009 04:53:59 GMT

"Everybody out of the water."

She swoops in and leaves the morgue full. A baby and two cardio vascular patients. Fire and a drunk. Yesterday she took a patient we operated on in PICU. You know it's bad when you chuck sterility and operate in public, horrified parents and neighbors watching.

"If you can fix this now, don't make us wait. Nobody will be coming back from the gate"

Bowls the color of storm clouds, black and grey. Swollen past the size of an adults. We needed her bed. She didn't last three hours. We took it, cleaned it, and brought it down for a boy who lived.

"Take what you can because you won't be here again"

Sugar is having nightmares. She was the Runner. And run she did. The baby died on my shift. I told Sugar in the morning. Nothing I could do helped. Not to those who still feel her.

"I don't know what to say. You don't care anyway."

They have frequent deaths in adult OR. Harvesting and CVs. Me^2 said we don't LET patients die on our tables. Don't know as such a thing can be true.

"We're like Crystal. We break easy."

And that's all there is to it.

Pragmatism says grab the glue, but don't mourne too long or all will stay broken.

Ahh, Radio Prophet. How you have helped.

What the Hell?

Sun, 22 Mar 2009 22:34:24 GMT

Seriously. What the hell?

Working this Sunday and we have no Peds ICU beds. None. 6 kids were brought in straight from a party for overdosing. They kicked out as many PICU children as possible to make room for the 6, but that pushed the hospital to the limit.

3 12 year olds overdosed on Tylonol. 3 15 year olds overdosed on Ecstasy.

Tylonol, the common man's suicide drug.

Ecstasy, the millenium LSD.

12 and 15.

Then again, the way things are right now, kids at this age are having babies.

Must resist urge to lock all my children in their rooms and tell them the Easter Bunny will wack their heads off if they step out of line. Have a feeling this is not the solution.

12. Can't even call yourself a teenager and you think life is too hard to handle. Wouldn't it be so much fun? Blarg.

The Tylonol kids need liver transplants. Two of the E kids won't make the night. The other is borderline.

Guess that will free off a bed.

Shit.

Now that that's off my chest . . . ish . . .

Testing for Blue belt this Wednesday. The mood settling endorphins of kung fu came back and the class after they did, Sue told me I was ready.

And So . . .

Tue, 10 Mar 2009 20:57:48 GMT

Have felt a tad bit complacent about kung fu lately. We go and do what feels like the same thing day after day. I shall admit that I have skipped a few days for no reason than that I wanted to do something more fun. And guilt of all guilts, I bribed someone not to go as well. Of course neigther of us was complaining when all was said and done.

Right.

Carry on then.

Found out Scruff was testing and I had yet to hear a word from Sue. Got a wee bit pissed. Threw it into problem solving . . . and won. No "won" exactly, but my spagetti arms snuck through all defenses, then droped down to block and punched right through and . . . I was spectacular. I have never had a problem solving round that brilliant. Sifu was watching and he talked to Sue and now . . . I'm testing.

If I can survive 3 minutes of Problem Solving with Sifu, I'm blue belt and off learning new stuff. New Stuff! Hurrah!

3 minutes. I don't think my fluke-ish round is enough to survive. March 25th.

Got 89% on my Math 30 class grade. It was the highest in the class. The 77 diploma mark dropped the overall average to 83%.

Now in Chem 20. Current mark is 92%. Here's hoping I can keep that up. My overall average isn't quite enough to get into NAIT. More than enough to get into grant Mac though. Hmmm.

Day 2 of rapier was quite fun. Once I get my own sword and armor, I'll be able to have more fighting time. A couple hundred . . . Hmm again.

Right arm is still sore. Need to work on left arm fighting.

Got my hair cut. irrelevent to future and carreer and etcetera. But I have bangs! I've found my inner bang!!

....... And have a major headache that won't go away. full week now.

Thus concludes.

Mon, 15 Dec 2008 01:16:20 GMT

First time ever I've been sent to search for a nipple.
Me: *blazes into Pediatric Emergency* "I need a nipple!" *is followed by stares*

Male nurse: "I saw lots of nipples in that cupboard."

Me: *grabs a nipple and flees*

Working today and call. We shall definitely be here until 10pm. 8am shift tomorrow.

Finally got our raises and back pay. 1k in backpay that raised my paycheck into the next tax bracket so I got . . . $400. It was very anti clamatic. Might get some of it back in end of year taxes. *shrug*

Lump sum next pay period. As well as 6 hours I was shorted. Think my FTE is too low for the full sum. Bah

But work will pay for my glasses in January. Which is good because they have been punched aqnd stepped on for far too long.

January 19th and I'm done with math. Yes! I thought I was doing swell, 85% then 96% on two of our 4 class exams. Trigonometric graphing and radian conversion is wigging me out. I have a Nyneave block going on. Glarg. Shal defeat said block by the trig test Saturday, then make up for it on the extra exam and by the dibloma shall have 90. That is how I say it shall happen, so stop with your looks.

Kung-Fu Goodness

Tue, 02 Dec 2008 21:35:19 GMT

Yes! Sifu has gotten the whip out. He's beating us to a talented pulp.

Three days of Fu in a row and Fellow couldn't walk. I had Math and work, so I only got Monday's blow.

We did forms and for every mistake that was made, EVERYONE had to do 10 pushups. This went on until we had it perfect.

Sifu: Just a few punches and we'll have break. Just the basics. Then break. One more time. Now Hammer. Now Crane. Now Hammer and Crane together. One more round and we go on break.

Which was his delightfully evil tricksy way of giving us hope so the pain wouldn't be so bad. He's even started saying do it till it hurts.

I love it!

The reason, we're doing an expo at West Ed. Skating rink. ice. Little nervous about that.

We will be Fu deamons.

Wonder if Iron Man will do the chopstick thing.

Saber class next month. *stretches* Wooden, but I get to keep it after.

The 2nd bow staff class was more than I had expected.

Think we'll be doing more weapons training.

I love kung fuuuuuuuu!!!!

Homework Time

Fri, 21 Nov 2008 21:40:37 GMT

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A lot.

My mission to take 3 years worth of math in 6 months is going swimmingly. I constantly feel like a dumbass, I punish my body with weeks of no supper and little sleep. I've given my weekends to math. I've taken Thursdays and Fridays off of work, all for the hate of math.

January 19th, it will be done.

Then I shall switch to a kinder master. Chemistry.

Oh dear chemistry, I'm sure your gasseous to liquid embrace will sooth after the nale file that is math.

I am convinced that despite my best efforts, math has defeated me. It has refused to reveal it's secrets. I no longer aim to learn, but only to learn long enough to past The Test. I need 90's in my diploma exam for my biology marks to be acceptable.

I went from making $100 a day at work, 130 if it was a weekend or evening, to making $86. This is the horror that is "benifits", that pus filled boil on my paycheques. If math did not so completely rule my hatred right now, I would start a holy war against benefits.

Luckily, they shall be giving me 3 raises by April. I am not sure what my daily take home will be, for I have yet to see the benifits pus ball. It will be there, no doubt.

Work continues to amuse.

4 year old boy: "I don't know why they're opening my stomach. I just want to poop. I'm not getting surgery. They're gonna help me poop."

Children make my work life that little bit more tolerable.

We've been hosting several guests. Radio hosts, the mayor, etcetera. The boss lady tells us to organise, but not to hide.

"Make it neat, but let them see the lack of space we have to deal with every day. Let them see how difficult it makes things"

We wouldn't be able to hide this shit if we tried.

I'm becoming a senior Service Worker at an alarming rate. There are now only three who have more hours than I do. Out of our now 9 staff, that's quite the responsibility. I've become someone to ask for the impossible.

Nurse Ass-grabber: "Dr C needs six rolls of Transpore. I want you to pull it out of the air and bring it to Theatre 29."

I was able to "discover" merely 5. Legendary acts in these times of backorders.

They give us half a million dollar equipment, but only a day's supply of tape and scrubs that we have to make stretch a week. What the hell? An anethetist refused to come in because there was nothing to wear but scrubs made for the obese. I kid you not, they were labled x-x-x-x-large. Four "x"s! Sheesh.

What are we supposed to do, Wear the betadine stained, who-knows-what-that-is clothes? Disgusting.

I think the hospital is running out of money. They're tucking in and calling it "an oversight". oversight my left butt cheek. They suddenly had to pay all of their support staff 9 months worth of back pay and now we can't find water? Water?! The hospital ran out of water!

*slumps*

So I'm gettin' me some education. It's the only logical answer to the equation.

I hate math.

Long Weekend and Logistics of Life

Tue, 02 Sep 2008 04:13:07 GMT

Took a break from work for a while. I wanted to take my vacation before my point four started and I had to ask permission with the possibility of it being denied. So away I went. Then when I came back, I was up to work the weekend. A long weekend it turned out to be.

Time and a haf, over time, shift diff, weekend premium. Good stuff. Definetly better than an empty paycheque.

I've been on for three days, then 3 hours off, then 8 hours more. Yay!

Keep feeling like I'm going to cry. A nurse was taking a ballon off a litle girl's bed and that action seemed so sentimental. Saw a picture an elephant drew, oh my, oh my. *rolls eyes at self* I have some morning to do. Never cried for what I really wanted to cry about. Now the little girl who hasn't eaten for three days because her surgery kept getting postponed gets my tears.

First day of Math 20 will be interesting. Halfway through I'll be leaving to bus my way in a fancy dress to a wedding. I realy need a car. Scared of driving though. =p

Logistics of getting a car:
Con:
I am in the highest priced age bracket for insurance
Gas is outrageous and would take away my play money
I know didly squat about car upkeep due to not paying attention when mum changed our tires
I need to take a class before I will feel comfortable driving
It's very stressful and I get heart palpatations whenever I sit in the drivers seat.
Pro
I can get places quickly.
Conclusion:
In other words, I'll wait a bit longer.

Logistics of getting a house:
Pro:
You have the freedom of creativity and destruction
Dogs always welcome
Family friendly
You get your money back when you rent or sell
Cons:
Takes a long time to save up a downpayment
Painful amount of paperwork
Have to do all maintenance yourself
Conclusion:
I'll wait a few years, but I'll be getting one soon. The pros are far larger in my mind than the cons.

And in conclusion, everyone at work (including me) is sick and trying in vain to hide it. Within hours of coming to work, they sneak and sniffle. Technically we should all be on sickleave, but logically there isn't anyone to relieve us. Plus we're getting paid well. Maybe not such a big consideration to some, but according to the above logistics, I have some big expenses comeing up soon.

Call It What You WIll

Wed, 30 Jul 2008 07:24:59 GMT

I've become so acustomed to blood at work that when I see it from myself I forget very easily that this is the body's way of saying something is wrong. 30 day periods are not normal, but I didn't even blink until someone mentioned something. Then . . . well something else happened and I payed my dues for plan B. That stopped the bleeding, but it came back. Finally got it sorted out, but I"m keeping a wary eye on it. Only have so much blood to lose.

One year to plan the career route. The idea of ONE thing being the only thing you do for the rest of your life galls. A few interrupted conversations with pap later and even he agrees Nursing may not be best. Well, no kidding!

Took some time off work to finish class. Got a 92% on my math 10 final, so I say it was worth it. Work missed me. They gave me my schedule for the next couple of months. I wasn't aware of a worry regarding not enough work hours and rent payment until I had a guaranteed work to rent ratio. Suddenly a tiny weight was off my shoulders. If I want play money, that means extra hours. I've put the word upstairs (point 4s can retain their casual status elsewhere). In 8 months, I've never had to use upstairs resources. They hired me. Laura stole me. Simple. Less pay working on the wards. And I've never worked a ward before. Less blood, more excrement from what I hear. Lordy. I don't want excrement! I like my blood and skull bits! I would much rather find a femur in the garbage than a dirty diaper.

Math 10 . . . Let me just say that high school kids are crazy! The "thing" right now is to be bi or homosexual. Can't be straight. oh no, that'll make you a slut. ... I wish I were kidding. I tried not to let them know my age, but the teacher went on about how I was the only one in the class who could leave early if I wanted. Why? I am a mature student.

Odd how what I saw as lack of success (no post secondary education, no career, lack of electronics, etcetera) they saw as "Cool". I was cool! To them, I had everything. My own place, a solid relationship, knee high leather boots, elegant yet kick ass style, no curfew and parents who couldn't boss me around. Weird weird weird little freaks.

Another example of their freakhood: When I went to school, wearing earphones and listening to music in class or during exams was unthinkable. Not an option. There, it was common.

Making friends with my neighbors. Some of them are hilarious. They introduce themselves by their medical problems. "I'm the epileptic" "I'm the liver transplant" "I'm the heart attack". It's like being at work! One of my neighbors works at a neighboring hospital and shares some of my schedules. I find it hilarious when we're working the same shift.

One of our litlte girls was on the news quite heavily. Amazing what they don't tell you on the news.

All of this is pouring out of me as I try desperately to avoid the temptation to go walking around the forest at midnight. I want to walk hand in hand with the storm. Want to drink it in and lose myself.

I listen to music and write instead.

*sigh*

Some days I just want to choose the non-safe route. Something off wall and unheard of. Something to shock. *laugh* As if any of that is new.

Jog On

Sun, 29 Jun 2008 06:34:06 GMT

Life has a way of caring fuck all for the plans you make.

Next week I start Math 10. Then Math 20 partime September through November, Math 30 November through January. Followed by Chem 20 and 30. If I nede to upgrade something to improve my average, that give me Summer of 09. MacEwan accepts summer courses for the fall term, The U does not. Still no closer to knowing The Career. You know, the one that's supposed to make you wet your pants every time you go to work.

As it is, I merely dampen my pants occasionally. Like when I carry amputated legs around the hospital.

Nurse: *hands over freshly amputated leg*
Me: May I suggest putting it in a box?
Nurse: If you think it necessary.

I did not want to wade through the vomit a dripping leg would cause, so I chose the box.

My fellow has come to visiting. No answer yet on whether plan "Do incorrigable things in the loo" is a go or not. No matter. The food and company is quite wonderful.

Yesterday I pretended that Friday meant the end of work. So here I am at midnight thirty still at work after having partied all the previouse night. And by party, I mean shake my body like a can-can dancer, not booze up.

Randomosity:
Have found three femurs in the garbage so far.
There is a porter with one leg, one arm, and one eye.
At night, PARR switches off Dora the explorer and puts on such movies as Blood Diamond and 6 Feet Under.
Needed to see a doctor, so i told a surgeon my tale, got a prescription, got the meds, and took one all within 20 minutes.
Security never asks for my ID when I come at night. My walk is too confident.
I have NEVER met so many conservative people as those who work here.
Coworkers (at least four): A sword?! What kind of people buy swords?!

Love to you all.

I got the point four position doing the exact thing I'm doing now. Only I get paid less due to them taking away summat for "benefits". Sucky ass health worker health care.

Back to the List

Sat, 31 May 2008 22:13:56 GMT

It's that time of year again: study time!

Plan: take a Pure Math 30 course. There's one in July, full time. Would end up working weekends or summat. Might just take time off. Need to call the place and see the logistics.

Might have to upgrade for university. DUnno. Later. Depends on what program I want to go into.

Part of me wants to go into human medicine, but part of me is wanting to do summat for animals. Zoologist. Vet? If I was to go into vetinary medicine, I would want to specialize in the exotics. Hell, I would want to treat them in the wild/reserves.

If I were to go into human medicine, I would want to do summat unconventional. Nurse seems so comon. The default option. Probably have said this before. On't think want to be a doctor. Hmmm. Much thought.

Need to talk to a uni councilor to see if it's feesable to get a General Bachlor of Science and specialize it later.

Bwuhahahahahahaha

Tue, 27 May 2008 21:08:00 GMT

Evening shift went swell. Al week the Satyr had his alarm set for 7 for the first time since he started his master, so I had plenty of time to run errands, get some sun, read, etcetera. Napped for a couple of hours, then came into work feeling as if it were a standard 7am day. Only it was 3pm. Evening has to be my favorite shift . . . except for the part where there can be no Kung-fu, and it's harder for me ot stay sleeping while on call.

Saturday tested for Green with Joe. I forgot Monkey Form 2 mid spear sweep! Suddenly had a "why is my hand in the air?" moment. I think the only reason I passed was that I had done Monkey Form 2 perfectly at least 7 time before the test. *sigh*

Sunday Dummy test went off without a hitch. I was perfect.

And due to having falen into one of my bad memories, during the first Class as a Green (Monday) I was in the Killer mode. Only sparred with the boys, felt no pain, slammed poor Flea into the ground several times and was choked quite thoroughly by Mr Steel. The Green belt basics are quite simple. More footwork. More shifting. The focus is less about timing and agility than balance and control.

Work this weekend. They have me training a recruit who is actually younger than me--by half a year, but still. We get along well enough. Again with the coworkers talking about how much I've changed.

"I went on vacation and when I came back, you were a different person".

Curious as to what I was before and what I am now. Feel more like I am in class when I'm sparring with the boys(verses when Shell and Joe are there)

Good Evening

Thu, 22 May 2008 23:39:02 GMT

I work the evening this week. My first evening. Not too shabby thus far. No overtime until yesterday. It was a very impressive . . . forty five minutes. Oh yeah. got off exactly at midnight.

Today the 2nd senier service worker, (been here for 4? years) pulled me aside and said that during the day, the other service attendents had been talking about me. Apparently I have grown, both in the way I handle things and the way I take iniciative. Said there was a bumpy patch in the beginning where everyone was stressed and so may not have "handled" me as they probably should have, and she was sorry for that. Said I should be proud of myself for doing so well.

So I gave her a hug.

Tis true, for a long time, as soon as I came to work, I would feel like an idiot. An outcast. Then all the staff shortages came, training of new recruits, supply problems . . . Now all is good.

When emergency strikes, I shine.

*turns on lightbulb*

Appreciation Day?

Thu, 08 May 2008 18:24:57 GMT

Had Monday and Tuesday off. Relaxed in my own way which did not involve sleep.

Wednesday when I came into work I was pummeled with a verbal storm. Tok me a bit to realize all the babble was . . . about me? For me? What? Oh Gods, what did I do this time. Fuck, the blood fridge?

"From 6am Saturday to 6am Monday,"

*raises brow* Wow, even in a hospital gossip exagerates. For the record, it was 1am Monday, not 6. Apparently the Charge Nurse frot the weekend shift made an announcement before my shift about what an "amazing job" I had done. The list of compliments went on, but my head was already swimming. "And she was even 10 minutes early for her shift the next morning." Um, yeah, that's because I slept in the lounge.

All day people kept coming to ask me how I survived te weekend, why was it so long? Two words, Lappy Appy. Ye Gods, the lappy appies! Lost count how many we did. A few stupid kids falling off things they shouldn't have been climbing in the first place. An exploding eye. All kinds of good stuff. Ooh, don't think I've mentioned the bloody femur in the soil room. That was a regular CSI event there. "Okay, who lost their leg?"

Um . . . ^___^ I love work. My work anyway.

Needless to say was very happy all day.

That night at kung-fu, Sifu and his wife had me go through the Orange belt moves, Monkey form 2, triangle step, 6 basics during chi sau . . . Didn't do anything wrong. Was pulled aside anyway.

I test for my Green belt Monday Many 26. It was supposed to be 24th, but I work that weekend.

"You work? On Saturday?" Sue just shook her head.

Today was Service Attendent Appreciation Day. In other words, today was another excuse to party and eat.

Did I mention I love what I do?

The Bare Stats

Mon, 05 May 2008 05:58:16 GMT

30 hours ago I left the hospital for a 40 minute bus ride home that proved futile. That was my last glimpse of anything outside the confines of this sudo-aseptic environment in 40 hours.

I heard a rumor that the past 48 hours have been very warm and sunny. Judging by the ambiant light that filters in every now and then as I am walking down corridors, I guess it must be so.

Worked 8 hours, got 45 minutes off, then worked 9 hours, slept 3.5 hours, and then worked 16 hours. Total of 33 hours worked in roughly a 37 hour time period. Not too shabby. 17 hours of overtime thus far with no end in sight. Whoo hoo!

The nurses have been just great about it. The nurse who works the day weekend is different then the on-call nurse, so they get a wee bit more sleep than a Service Attendent. They've been telling my shift tale to everyone they come in contact with including parents, housekeeping, flouro, and the CSS staff. It's hilarious.

This morning around 3:30, they ganged up on me and tucked me in. When a nurse tucks you in, you aren't getting up any time soon. Fully dressed except for my shoes, a warm blanket around me, they took over my duties for a few hours so I could catch a tiny bit of rest. Then 7am I got a text and instant alertness befell upon me.

One of the day nurses heralds from Miami and took to smacking me with her purse. Jokingly of course. She says I had wanted overtime, so overtime I got. Then she got food for me and had me sit down for a bit. We had a nice discussion about a persons tolerence and good atitude in the face of life. She says it is because I am young that I am able to shrug stay cheerful.

"I'm cheerful because there is food. If there was no food, you would have very grumpy support staff today"

Have been taking the advice of a much loved and missed fellow collegue who left us last month. He once told me that the secret to being loved was loving, the power of being liked and respected was in respecting and liking. Happiness came from being happy.

A little simple wisdom from Kenya I suppose. Or maybe just him.

Felt fine all day today. Just around 9 I started feeling the hours again.

Currently craving a hug like a junkie needing a fix. Good thing my hugging human is back.

I Retract It All!!

Sun, 04 May 2008 06:40:09 GMT

In the intereset of not falling over onto the operating table and drooling myself away while equally tired nurses prepare me for a non-existing surgery, I shall type. Can't sleep if you're typing. not only have I updated my laswt post, I shall post again! Isn't thins no limit to posting wonderful? Keep an eye out for more! The new day has already begun. Hah! That's where the 'u' goes!

>.> Um . . . yeah, no one said this post would make any sense.

Is it a bad sign when the anesthesiaologist is sleeping right beside you? Maybe there's a gas leak. Except all the stupid machines leak. Maybe there's a bigger leak than normal? or you know, we could all just be tired.

The nurses have different people working day and on-call. Service Workers not so much. Something about negotiating for less weekend shifts biting people in the rear because we have no dirrect patient care (as in decision making shtuff) and so legally can work however long they want us to and if they say "you are not going home" . . . well then we are not going home, no matter that we came in at 8am and leave at 1 am then come back at 7am for a shift.

I am nearing my experation date but they keep me int he refrigerator. Oh nos! I shall curdle.

Waaay funnier when I told the NICU nurse that. We had a good giggle about curdling milk, the neo had a good attempt at out noising us, and the elevators were all ours.

Oh, that's bonus. A shiny. The elevators all come when you call as soon as you call compaired to waiting for an elevator for twenty minutes because the three that DID stop on your floor were all full.

Ugh, I don't feel so good. The nausea and headaches have been joined by backaches that travel. Starts in the back, shoots to my chest.

oh God, make that machine stop yammering at me!!

Gotta go.

Working on the Weekend is Great!

Sat, 03 May 2008 20:30:23 GMT

The weekend shift has got to be the best shift ever. Work up to 48 hours straight, load up on shift deference, overtime, and weekend premiums, then take 2 weekdays off to relax and recoupe.

It's harder when you're by yourself, but things are spread out more, so work incredibly hard then rest really well.

And I get a lot of spare time to myself.

EDIT: It is eight minutes to midnight. Still at work. Yay! Yay? Um, okay, yay was a bit of an overstatement.

Worked a 7-1515 shift Monday through Friday, then an 8-1615 shift Saturday and Sunday. Thus far, went home at 1638, got called back 1639. No joke. And by "go home" what I mean is "two blocks away from home". They're probably not going to be done with this little one until 2 or 3. If that's the case I'm just going to find a comfy couch somewhere in the hospital and sleepin until 8. Barely worth goin home as it is considering I have to wake up at 6 to get on the bus.

G'night world. I'll join you in slumber come Monday.

Wed, 23 Apr 2008 22:33:37 GMT

Today was a piece of work. I did not go to work today because of a paycheck, I went because I feared being home alone with the ghosts. otherwise I would have called in sick like everyone else and given the world the bird from the safty of my bed.

I was the only daytime support staff today.

And yesterday.

Monday, there was one other.

Normally we have 4 day people, and then a staggered start time of once an hour with relief.

With the April snow, everyone and their brother wanted to stay home. The Anesthetic Tech was quite bald faced about it. Of course she's been working for the hospital pretty much since it was a hospital and not a clinic, so she can get away with it. Everyone else has to fake a cough. Except the people who really were coughing, but very few people believed them.

There were only five people in our staff meeting. laughable since we are normally filling a theatre.

Boss lady: How are you guys holding up?
Shadow Master: My legs are sore
Me: My _everything_ is sore!

Didn't help I was crying most of the day.

Who me?

Tue, 11 Mar 2008 20:52:59 GMT

Well I slept all right. Slept right through the alarm that was supposed to wake me up after my siesta so I could go to kung-fu. Texted Shell explaining why I missed class sometime after I woke up at frick-what-did-i-do o'clock. She had a good laugh as she is the Matron of late shifts. Told her to tell everyone Killer was getting tattoos with a harem of hunky sailors and if anyone tried to wake me up I would drool on them. Fear the mighty drool!

However, got in kung-fu time after all by beating up my bed partner in my sleep. Head knock, chin to eye, nose meets elbow!!! Not quite as noteworthy as the time I gave him a perfect jaw punch mid-snore, but still pretty sweet.

Without me having said a word about it, it is fully expected that any lover of mine shall be bruised. "Is he still alive?" is in fact the official greeting between one classmate and I.

Silly points and food. Woman at work asked me how many points one got for eating squid. In a flippant mood I told her none as the fisherman got all of the points for the kill. Wrong answer as now she is on a squid diet. Something about a "food plan" that tallies up what you eat into points and you can't have more than a certain amount of points. Are you serious?

Hell, I'm just happy my breasts grew back and have finally evened out. Who cares if I weigh more than Sifu's wife?

Have to figure out the breast growth thing. Is it because of hormones? Excercise? can't be excercise. Kung-fu bloody well stole my breasts. Maybe the lifting at work? BCP sounds more likely.

"Do they feel even to you?"
Lemme check.
So?
Hmmm, might need to check again.

If only the growth didn't hurt. It's the same pain as growth spurts when I was little. Wakes me up in teh middle of the night and has me tossing fit to insanity.

Sleeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeep

Mon, 10 Mar 2008 19:07:34 GMT

Where are you oh Sandman my friend? My weekend was not restful due to . . . not resting.

I have learned my lesson. Load up the sleep bank before an on call shift.

Second lesson: eat.

Did not eat breakfast, did not bring a lunch, was not allowed to leave hospital. All food places in hospital closed. No supper. SO hungry. I shall not put into writing the things I did to aquire sustenence.

Remember waaaay back when I was in EMR school and lost my binder and nearly failed my exams due to not having any notes? Well a woman comes in here with it. The sister of a patient. How do I know? The markings were the same. And it's gell. And it rolls up. And it's green. AND I BLOODY WELL PUT MY NAME ON IT!!

Of course I did not say anything. It's been almost a year and it was my fault for leaving it on the bus in the first damn place, but still . . . DO you know how many hours I haunted the lost and found? How desperate I was to find it before someone let me copy her notes? All because someone thought it was cool and felt no need to take it to ETS or even report it to the bus driver.

Right. I am not getting angry. I am not getting angry.

*deep breath*

Worked 16 hours last night. from 8am to thirty minutes after midnight. Then had to wake up at 6am to come to work at 7. AM ready to collapse, but have to keep going because of kung-fu tonight, then Dad coming tomorrow, then . . .

Always a reason not to sleep.

Whooo Hooo!!

Sat, 08 Mar 2008 17:39:48 GMT

I'm working the weekend baby. *does goof dance* It's Monday. It's Monday. Working 7 days in a row. Tuesday's hump day. Yesterday was Sunday. Oh yeah!

First weekend shift. It's been put off for a long while. Orientating. Feels like a holiday when it's slow like this.

Patient: Miss, miss! The results of the test. Do I have it? *points to his chart*
Me: This can't tell you your future, only your past.

To cover such wisdom I am curently freaking out staff by munching on squid. Had to explain to someone the definition of "squid".
Me: It lives in the ocean and looks like a penis with legs. *gnaws on strip*
Mr Solomon: 0.o

Solomon-the-ladies-wise-one: Someone came to me and was like 'oh, she's so shy' *bends over in half laughing* And I say 'her? Shy? Oh brother, you don't know her very well'
Me: Fah!
S: You almost killed me!
Me: Because you locked me in a closet than turned off the lights!

That particular closet is a freaky ass piece of work. Can't even explain why, but all of the student nurses are afraid of it. When the door slams on you, you can't help feeling entomed. Your remaining minutes counted and found lacking.

Bah.

Wing Chun is going on now and I am missing it because I am working. That is the only negative. Monday class comes earlier today.

But I'll make class next Monday, my Tuesday and a half. Not Wednesday. Haven't made up my mind about next Saturday's class. Depends on my plans with my father.

On call today and tomorrow. That'll be odd with Daylight savings time. Either get a ride from my best friend from my place, get a ride from a coworker, or sleep over at afore mentioned best friend's place. Mabe a combo of the three.

Have some symptoms to look up. I don't understand why he is sick and I don't know how to help. He says it is normal this time of year. They are odd symptoms. He shakes until all of his muscles ache and he groans with the pain of it, but still he can't stop. His skin is so hot, but he craves more. Says no matter how thick the blankets, he can't get warm enough. I join him in the covers and hold him to me, whispering words to help him relax. Once he does relax, the chill stop and I can gently lower the covers. Then he is racked with coughs, runs to the bathroom, and when he comes out the chill have returned.

I want to do something, but none of my training can help.

Stupid helplessness.

The Net . . . working

Tue, 04 Mar 2008 16:43:58 GMT

Ahhh, I get it now.

Net. Work. Net. work. Network. Cast nets while at work. Duh!

So many people know each other that it turns out I am not the only one excited about my father's visit next week. There are at least four other ladies equally excited and that is just weird. I don't want to know!!!

Ahem.

At home I know all my neighbors (a fact further made amazing when one considers that I only sleep there every other night and NEVER on weekends . . . unless mum is not there in which case double bed trumps television. Which reminds me I need one.)

At work more people know me than I know. Be walkin and someone says summat summat __name__ summat summat and I'm like *head smack* And then THAT gets passed through the wringer. Ye Gods! The counting bit in the Central Sterilizing got me aquainted with Service Workers in the adult OR who come over to DayWard every now and then.

Speaking of Dayward, yesterday they looked at their staff booking slate and realized a disturbing fact: They had none! Ooops. Quick call, quick panic, 'nother quick call and a woman with the name of a Disney Villian came and presented herself to me for training. She did not bring cookies, so her training was cut short, but at least she won't be double booking rooms.

Service Worker one vs service worker two, nothing highlights the differences as when one tries to explain.

Like in class: So I saw you at the hospital yesterday, what do you do?
Me: I clean the OR rooms, keep the sureons happy, gather the instruments for the surgery, get patients, run samples, hold limbs for preperation in the OR, help in recovery, make kids laugh, comfort crying parents . . .
Them: *confused look* So . . . you touch bones and shit?
Me: I've touched more brains stuff than shit. Pre-ops are starved for 24-48 hours to prevent death during anesthesia.
Them: *blinkblink*

Another Day, Another Lesson

Tue, 26 Feb 2008 19:30:07 GMT

Didn't get much sleep last night. Maybe two hours? My best friend was sick and we woke up numerous times to relieve his chest. He let me hold him while the coughs wracked his body. Let me try to give him my strength. I'm glad he knew how much that meant to me.

Today I was introduced to the neonate intensive care unit. Pulls me.

Yesterday went so fast. The 7am shift is nice like that. Three more hours until I go home. There's talk of pulling one of us over to Day Ward for some overtime. The woman who I shadowed in Peds OR worked 12 hour shifts all last week. Wee bit of longing. That would have looked good in my savings account.

A boy I was taking to get his chemo took a picture of me. I didn't mind it for once. His mum had the most defeated look I have ever seen and the boy spent a solid 2 minutes arguing with her. He insisted that this would be the last chemo he would need, but she kept telling him he would always need more.

Sometimes I sing to the kids. Just ditties or Disney movie lines. Anything that pops in my head. Did the same taking this one up after everything.

He was so still. Normally they start waking up from the anesthesia and are able to greet their parents by the time we get upstairs. This guy just fell into a deeper and quieter sleep. A part of me says they wouldn't have sent him up if he wasn't okay, but . . . I don't know. We couldn't wake him so I carried him into bed. The nurses huddled around and there was such an air of forced hopefulness.

On my way back, I realized I was still humming the same song. A shiver went through me and I could have sworn this boy was walking behind me on his way out of the glass windows toward the shining sun.

The song? When the Saints Come Marching In.